The Worst Game Ever Invented

You always hear people saying they are playing a "waiting game."  Everyone plays this game at some point in their life.  Based on my own experience, I believe it is the worst game ever invented.

Most likely if you are waiting on something and it feels like time is standing still, it is a situation that you want to have resolved as soon as possible.  It could be exciting news or news that could possibly change the direction of your life. The longer time goes by and you don't know the news, the longer you live in a state of complete distraction.

Other than not being able to move forward, the worst part of waiting is the situation is totally out of your control.  If you are waiting and feeling tortured about it then someone else probably holds the answer to your situation.  You can't call and bug them, sending nagging emails, or try to rush things along without the risk of sounding desperate, being annoying, or possibly influencing the outcome to not be in your favor depending on the situation.  So you have to wait.

Here are some tips on making the wait more tolerable:
1. Find something else to do during the wait.  This will help time go faster and keep you productive.  It is amazing how many chores you can accomplish or how satisfying it can be to check off some of those home projects. Find something that will tie up your thoughts or go get lost in a movie or conversation with friends.

2. Take a moment to acknowledge that you never had control of this situation in the first place.  God has a plan for you and His will is better than anything you can come up with or desire. Even if you get the answer you have been waiting for and it isn't what you had hoped you can rest easy because all things work together for good for those who believe. So no matter what, everything will be just fine.  Just believe, really believe, and you will be able to relax.

3. Take what ever step you can take. What is the next step if you get your answer?  Can you research anything? Can you get ready? Can you plan the next step without implementing anything?  Maybe take a moment to write things down.  Drawing a decision tree, make a plan A or Plan B diagram, create a list, and just let your mind and thoughts progress.

Waiting can be a great training tool for developing patience.  God could be working things around during your wait time to make the answer better for you.  Waiting is the worst game ever invented but you don't have a choice in whether you experience it so you have to try and make the best out of the situation. You will wait for something important at some point so choose to make the situation as good as it can get.  So what are you waiting for?

Taking Steps to Prevent the Victim Mentality

Victim: one that is acted on and usually adversely affected by a force or agent

Once you are a victim your life is never the same.  Your life comes to an abrupt halt and is forced down a path that you never thought you would have to go.  The new path is really bumpy at the start.  There are potholes, obstacles, and it is hard to see in front of you but easy to see what you have had to leave behind.

No one wants to be a victim but inevitably we all will be one in our lifetime, if not many times.  Whether it is an attack, a burglary, a broken heart, job loss or something else, we all will experience it at some point in our lives. The severity will vary with each person and each incident but there only seems to be two results of being a victim.  Some people are able to move on with their lives and continue down the new path of their life while others get caught going in circles at the beginning of their new path.

When you are going in circles it holds you back from greatness.  You waste precious time rehashing the past and remain unhappy for a long time.  When you take action, take steps, you are using your time wisely and you can turn your focus to things that will bring you or other people happiness. 

So how do you know which victim group you are in?

The people that get caught going in circles demonstrate some common behaviors:

1. They talk about their situation every day.  They are continually trying sort out what happened and in the process seek empathy from other people.

2. They think that other things that happen in their life all relate back to the moment their life changed when they became a victim.

3. They focus on trying to undo what happened.  They think that if they could just go back in time and fix the situation things would be back to normal again.


The people that are able to keep going on their path and move on also demonstrate some common behavior:

1. They accept their new path and keep taking steps to move further down it.

2. They try not to talk about their situation all the time and prevent people from even knowing that they are on a new path.  They just want their new path to appear to be normal.  They talk about their situation when there is a better story to tell.

3. They learn from their experience and try to help others by preventing them from being a victim or by helping those who need to take those first steps down their own new path.

When you are sent down a new path in your life, one that you would not have chosen, you have a choice to make.  It is completely normal to feel emotional, that the situation was unfair, and that it didn't have to happen.  Being a victim comes with confusion and emotion and it takes time for your heart and mind to heal.  However, being emotional and confused doesn't mean you can't start taking steps onto your new path.  The more steps you take the more the healing happens.  Everyone has to take steps at their own pace but what is most important is that the steps are happening.  If you stop moving forward you can get stuck going in circles.

You can't go back in time but you can choose how you spend your time moving forward.  Your new path is your new normal.   Just keep taking steps.

The Cure For Worry

I am a recovering worry-aholic but I have found the cure.

Every time you are in the throws of uncertainty you start to worry. People try to help you by telling you not to worry. Which at that moment, is probably the hardest if not the most impossible thing for you to do.

With the uncertain times happening in our economy and the drama that is on the news every night it is hard not to worry. None of us know what the outcome will be and jobs, investments, and the comforts of life are all at risk.

People say, "try not to think about it" or "stay busy." While these are good tactics they are only temporary because the worry has a way of creeping back in to your thoughts. You can only stay so busy for so long and trying not to think about it means you have to think about something else which if you could do that you wouldn't be worrying in the first place.

Is there a cure for worry? A 12 Step program? A quick-fix pill? Does it take hyponotism or therapy? No, not for me. It was simple and it was right in front of me the whole time.

Let Go - Give up Control.

It was brought to my attention recently that I wasn't in control and never had been. The tighter I tried to control things the more stressed I became. Once I fully understood that the person really in control was more experienced, in the know about what going on, and had my best interest at heart it was easy for me to let go and trust Him.

I still have my moments but they are short-lived now that I know what what I need to do. By trusting and letting go of the control I can live with uncertainty without the fear and without the paralyzing physical effects worry can bring. Now I have peace and confidence that things will be just fine no matter what.

If you need to know this worry-free helper He is easy to find. Just close your eyes and pray and He will be there. God is the worry warrior. Let Him fight the battle for you. After all, He already knows the game plan and has a perfect record.

25 "Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? [7] 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34 "Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
Matthew 6:25